I just can’t believe this … it’s already January 4th. Where did the last 4 days go? It’s going so fast again. *so shocking*
A year full of changes
If I have to discripe my year 2017 with ONLY one word, it will be … CHANGES !
As a girl on the autistic spectrum, I have to say : “I HATE CHANGES”. It’s so hard for me to deal with new things that are coming to me without I asked for it.
So last year was very hard for me. A lot of changes in every part of my life. Here’s some more about everything …
At the end of 2016, I got more and more tasks to do at my old office. My work hours and workdays to do all the things didn’t changed. So more work, and more stress.
All that work ended up with longer workdays. I started at my office at 7.30 am and most of the days I left at 5.15 pm. More than I should be there, but there was no alternative.
My old workplace was not in my area, but near Brussels. So in the mornings I had to leave home and take the train at 6.15 am (every single workday). Most of the days I came home at 7 pm.
As I don’t have a drivers licence, I had to take public transportation like the train and the bus. That combination of trains and busses was horrible.
A lot of stress before work of all the people in the train/bus, than a stressy day at work, and going back with more stress because I was always late at home.
In November 2016 most problems started again like the symptons of an autistic burn-out. But in January 2017 I was ready to get some more help, and I was able to have a positive feeling about the new year. I was planning of searching a new job, closer to home.
Than February 2017 came … The announcement of around 70 people will lose their job in March. So horrible. Together with my depression feelings and that new I got very ill (mentally).
In March I knew I was one of the ‘lucky’ people who was going to lose their job in June. When I got the news I was okay with it. About 15 minutes later, when I saw my colleagues I crashed. Than I realized I had to leave all of them behind and leave the work I loved to do. change # 1
After taking a long break I didn’t had to go back to work, so May 18 was my last day. A month earlier.
During 3 months I got some amazing support from a extern company here in Belgium to find a new job. As an accountant there are still plenthy of jobs in my area, and still receiving invitations for jobs.
I decided that with my autism (together with my psychiatrist and psychologist) I could work a fulltime job in an office the following months. So time for a new plan. I really love fashion and more I really like shoes.
If I had to search for a new job, I wanted to do something where I can share my passion for shoes and fashion with others. So I went searching for a job as a shoeseller or fashion advisor (I have a diploma ‘fashion advisor’).
After some tests and interviews I found THE MOST AMAZING job in the world. I started to work in my favorite shoestore. I can talk about shoes all day long. I’m now so happy when I can go to work.
This new job (a new big change) change # 2 changed my life in a positive way. I’m so GRATEFUL for the change I got to work for this amazing team of colleagues ! It’s just like working in a store full of family or friends.
Okay … working in a shoestore is so hard when you have less money because you work parttime. You know what I mean … putting a shoelover in a shoestore is like a kid in a candy store ! It’s so hard!
Another change in my life last year. In May I had to say goodbye to my grandma. It was so hard, after knowing here my whole life. As a farmers daughter we always were together here. change # 3
That with losing my job in March was so hard that I crashed at work when I got the message she past away. But with some great mental help, I had giving it a place. Not having to go back to work was also a great thing.
Now in January I still have some difficult moments, but that’s everything here reminds me of her (she lived her too).
3. Building a house
Can you guess it? Oh yes another big change. After hunting for the perfect house for years, I started to build (let it build by great people) my own house. Just a little house, but it’s all new, and all the things I like are there.
I had to change to create it the way that I wanted it to be. So now I have the outside looking like the grey bricks of the Cinderella castle at Magic Kingdom in Walt Disney World. (will post some pictures later, as it’s not whole finished at this day).
This is change # 4 , and it’s going to be a big CHANGE in this year. Hoping to move out after living here at home for 33 years! I’m now going to move to my own place with my 2 beloved cats.
I hope we can be happy there all on ourselfs (me and the cats).
4. Starting a blog
In January 2017 I started a blog here on WordPress (called AutiLucy) about my life at that moment and all the problems I had living my autistic life.
During all those months I was not that ‘happy’ blog.
I took me till June to feel better and better and started to live a happier life again. Left all my previous problems behind.
So my life changed, got my happy life back. I never felt that happy in years ! I was so done with posting on my old blog, because it was a daily remember of all the bad things that happend the past months.
A fresh start in my life, so a fresh start in blogging ! change # 5
In october I started to use Twitter again to share my daily story with people who were kind to me and were interested in my store. So also a THANK YOU to you reading my blog at the moment. I means so much to me.
Day after day I feel so much better when I can blog. It’s like I found of way to talk to people, to share my story, found somebody to listen to me.
5. Losing colleagues, friends
In 2017 I lost the colleagues I loved to work with. But when going to a weekly appointement of ‘outplacement’ I felt better. Now that all of that is over, I kind of miss them. change # 6
During the months of 2017 I also lost some friends. First they stopped talking to me, but hey I’m over that now.
I have a few friends and now I have the amazing colleagues where I can talk to. Oh now I’m putting ‘have’, hope that in don’t have to put ‘had’ in a few weeks as my contract is almost finished. But I will still go shop there, so will see them for sure.
6. Losing weight
At the end of all the changes 2017 gave me. It also gave me the change of losing weight again. I lost 17 kg from January till August. Just eating healthier, making healthier choices. change # 7
The weight came on because of all the medication I had to take for my depression / autistic burn-out. I still take some of that medication but I eat less and drink more water.
I’m also became a big fan of Noimi Smart and since I have here first cookbook I’m all into eating better.
I stopped eating meat, and trying to eat more veggies.
As part of my autism, I have some problems with eating. I eat things in an order, start my day with the same breakfast every single day. If I liked something to eat, I can eat that for days, till the moment I had enough.
On days I work till 7 pm I don’t eat a warm (good) meal, but now I trying to eat a healthy wrap with spinach.
7. Parttime job, parttime money
After working a fulltime job for more than 10 years, I started to work a parttime job. I was used to buy the things I like. To buy the parfum and make-up I wanted and that was so good, but so expensive (looking at it now). change # 8
Now I have half the budget, but not half the costs in my life. Guess that part of bills will never change. You always have to pay the bills and bills are still coming. So shocking. But the truth.
Now I have to look at things I want for weeks, plan it, make a budget and safe a lot of money (a lot of money).
Not buying the shoes you like, when you’re working in a shoestore. SO yeah it’s a hard life having a budget. Plan for 2018 is to find a way to get more money but not having to work outside the house for a fulltime job. Doing a parttime job as extra from here at home, that will work for me. No stress of public transportation which made my days so bad.
8. What about 2018?
Well, 2018 will be another year with big changes. But now I feel happy and for the first time I’m okay with all the new things coming my way. Kind of strange to say that I’m feeling okay with changes in my life.
Here are some changes that are coming to me in the next months:
- some hospital appointements coming soon, and it’s pretty scary for me.
- can I stay at my job or not? searching a new job or not?
- decorating my new home
- preparing my cats to move
- moving out
- hospital for some test for fibromyalgia or ???
- finding an extra job or find a way to become a freelance blogger or writer, or trying to life from my blog. Can’t live my life with less money because of my fulltime job.
- starting a budget planner to start safe money
Probably more changes coming, but you’ll be the first to know it.
I’m ending my blog here. Enough changes to talk about. In every single part of my life I had to make changes.
Love Lucy xx
If you have some tips on how to get more money as a blogger, freelancer, etc from home, please let me know.